Pause Button

You know those moments where you just sit and reflect on life, love, memories, family, and feel so blessed and content that you just want to hit the pause button and stop time? That's how I'm feeling right now.

We've been looking for an internship for Jared this summer, and since internships often lead to job opportunities, we've been thinking hard about where we would want to end up. As exciting as it is to think about finally leaving the world of college students and entering "the real world", I will be sad to leave this part of our life behind. The time where we still have the world at our feet.  I know we will always look back at our college years with fond memories, and I try to make the most of them.

Since getting married, I have come to appreciate and love my family even more. Apart from the realization you get of how each person in your family shaped you and made you who you are, you just flat out miss (and need) them. When I was a single college student, my role in life was school (and let's be honest - fun), and in the back of my mind I always knew I'd go be going home for Christmas, or summer, or whatever the next break was, and I kind of took it for granted. When we first got married, it was kind of a struggle for me. Since Jared happened to be from the town I just finished college in, I graduated but never left - and although my family was far away, his was just a few blocks over. It was a great blessing for us to be so near his family, but sometimes it was hard to feel like I had started a new, married life; I just felt like I had joined his. And I missed mine. I missed my home, I missed my family, I missed our traditions and holidays, I missed the warm weather, I missed the city. Somedays I just felt so out of place.

Now that we're down at BYU (and my family ended up moving about a half hour away), I can really appreciate having the people I love so close. I know we're at a stage of life that won't last forever, and I am just cherishing it while it lasts. Jared is getting close to graduating, and we don't know where his first job offer will be. My sisters in college are not married yet, but it will be interesting to see where their futures take them. Kendall only has one year of high school left and then will go to college. It's nights like tonight where we can get together with my sisters and go bowling on a whim that make me want to just hit pause. In a few years we could all be spread out going about our seperate lives, but for the moment I love being connected to each other.

So here's to cherishing the ones we love most, and appreciating each moment and stage of life we're in. Every stage of our life is so unique, and I don't ever want to feel like I let any of it pass by.